Is this fun for me?
Is it wearing me out to the point that I can’t keep up with regular responsibilities?
Is there a way to simplify it, delegate it, or do it at another time of year?
Is this fun for my kids?
Am I spending so much time getting ready for the event that the kids feel neglected?
Can I afford this?
Is it worth going into debt for?
Is there a way I can cut costs and still do it?
What is it teaching my children?
Am I (are we) helping other people?
How can I change it to fit my family better?
What is the worst thing that can happen if we quit doing it?
Is there something I would rather be doing?
Which of the above values trumps all others? Right now, is is more important to 1) help othes/stay in in touch with others, 2) spend time with my kids, or use this activity to instill values, 3) save money, 4)save time? Some things might be so important to me, that I want to do it even if all the other questions were answered, “no.”
Here is a sample of how someone might answer these questions to find a new solution:
Should I keep sending out Christmas cards?
Is this fun for me? No, but I really want to stay in touch with old friends and relatives
Is it wearing me out to the point that I can’t keep up with regular responsibilities? Yes--the season is way too hectic!
Is there a way to simplify it, delegate it, or do it at another time of year? I could send out Easter cards instead. I could send an e-mail. I could make cards and address them in the summer, and just sign them with a short note at Christmas, I could reduce the list to the people who would really appreciate getting it.
Is this fun for my kids? They are not involved. But maybe they would have fun helping me make cards.
Am I spending so much time getting ready for the event that the kids feel neglected? yes!
Can I afford this? This isn’t so bad, but everything combined is way too much.
Is it worth going into debt for? No!
Is there a way I can cut costs and still do it? E-mail isn’t as personal, but it would sure save money. Making postcards instead of cards in an envelope would make it a lot cheaper. I could send cards instead of presents to more people.
What is it teaching my children? That staying in touch with friends is important.
Am I (are we) helping other people? Not really
How can I change it to fit my family better? Get the children involved
What is the worst thing that can happen if we quit doing it? Few people would even notice.
Is there something I would rather be doing? Spending time with my kids.
Which of the above values trumps all others? Right now, is is more important to 1)stay in in touch with others, 2) spend time with the kids, or instill values, 3) save money, 4)save time? Spending time with my kids
Possible solutions:
1. Quit sending out cards--no one would even notice
2. I want to stay in touch, so I will send cards at a less hectic time of the year.
3. Get the children involved in making the cards in a party atmosphere--listen to Christmas music, eat Christmas cookies, and while the kids make the cards, the parents address the envelopes and write messages. Keep photo albums handy and tell the kids stories about the people you are writing to.
4. I need to cut costs this year, but I still want to stay in touch, so I will send e-mail messages--less personal is better than not at all.
uestions to Ask Yourself
