Seasons > Valentine’s Day > Ways to celebrate valentine’s day with the family> Ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your Spouse

Since a close, loving relationship with your spouse is what keeps all the other aspects of the family running smoothly, this is a keystone that needs regular maintenance. Having fun with your mate is an essential, not a luxury you can skimp on. Now, how cool is that?

Kidnap your mate

It can be for a meal or a weekend. Just do all the legwork of finding a babysitter, packing a bag, and making reservations. If you want to really have fun, use a water gun and blindfold--just make sure it doesn’t look too realistic--you wouldn’t want to spend the weekend in jail! If you think getting a babysitter is impossible, get creative--drop the kids off at the grandparents, or send them each for an overnight at a friend’s house, or work out a deal with a friend to swap--they take care of your kids this weekend, and you will take theirs at a later date. If you both think this is impossible to do, you REALLY need to do this one!

Fix His Favorite Meal

Get the kids involved in coming up with the menu and let them choose which part they want to help with. It’s a good way to help them understand that Valentine’s day is all about doing special things for the people you love. Round out the meal with some heart shaped foods for a valentine banquet fit for a king. But a wise woman once said, “You can cook in the kitchen, or you can cook in the bed, but you can’t do both.” So on those nights, order pizza!

Write a Love Letter

Whether you buy a card or make one, the important thing is what the message says. And more than just saying a simple, “I love you,” it is important to tell him specifics of what you appreciate about him. Think about being complimented on a meal you have slaved over for hours--which one would make you feel more appreciated’ “That was a great meal.” or “The meat was so juicy and tender, and so flavorful! It was outstanding!” Do the same thing for your man to make him feel loved.

Read Old Love Letters

It’s fun to go back and read letters and cards that you wrote years ago, and reminisce about old times. But you can’t do that if you don’t save them! So make a file or decorate a box and keep them all--even if it is a post-it note he left in the cupboard for you. My personal preference for storage of cards and letters is one of those notebooks with clear plastic sleeves. It makes storage easy--just slip it on a bookshelf. it also makes it easy to get the cards and letters  out to look at--just turn pages instead of having the pile slip off your lap and onto the floor.

Watch a Chick Flick Together

This may require some negotiating and planning. If he hates chick flicks, then work out a deal that he gets to go out with the boys, or go golfing (or what ever he likes but doesn’t get to do often) in return for watching it with you. You also need to make sure it is a movie he can sit through, so research carefully before you choose. With so much available through i-tunes, there are a lot of options to rent or buy. But even watching movie trailers, you can’t always be sure, and friends can have different standards of what they watch. Plugged in on line is one site that will give reviews and warnings about potential problem areas. Fireproof is a movie about a couple on the verge of divorce, and the husband’s dad gives advice to try to save the marriage.  It’s available in English and Japanese (which comes bundled with a book that outlines the 40 day plan that the main character follows to save his marriage.) Watching this movie together might be a great way to start conversations of how to improve your own marriage.

link to fireproofyourmarriage.com

link to i-tunes website

link to Plugged in on line website

link to FFJ that sells the Japanese version of Fireproof

Plan a Special Trip

Get travel brochures or look up the information on line. Spend the evening together planning places you would love to go, and find out local attractions. You will have a fun evening that didn’t cost a penny, and then, one day, when you want to surprise him (anniversary?), you will already know exactly what he would like to do. Sneaky, huh?

Double Date with Another Couple

Sometimes it’s fun to do something fun with another couple to get a new perspective on life. Because we often end up talking about the same things as a couple, conversing with another couples can be a refreshing change. Getting babysitters for both families can be a challenge, but one solution is to get a third couple to take care of all the kids, then trade off so that each couple has a chance to go out as well as take a turn with  the child care.

Do Something Silly

Laughing together is a good way to make more happy memories. But most of us get so busy with living life that we cut out the fun times just to try to get everything done. The danger there is that we become strangers, or worse, enemies. So do something totally out of character, and give yourselves something to laugh about for years to come... ”Remember the time we ...? Can you believe we did that?!” If you can’t think of anything silly to do, at least rent a comedy to help you see the funny side of life.

Give Your Mate a Quiz About you

If your husband is clueless about the things that you would like him to do for you, or just doesn’t pick up on your hints, here is a fun way to let him know. Make two sets of cards. On one set of cards, write some questions about yourself that you want your husband to know. For the second set of cards, both of you can write cards of things you would like to get from the other person (back rub, flowers, favorite dessert, etc.) Then for each question he gets right, he gets to choose a card from the second set, and any that he misses, you get to choose. Be sure to keep it fun, and praise him up and down for all the things he already knows. When you make up the quiz, be sure to include at least some things you know he knows--if he misses every question, it won’t be much fun for him, and thus less motivating to do something. No one likes to feel like a loser. Keep a balance, so that he feels like he is on the right track, but could learn a few new tricks.

Give Him What He Really Wants

We all know that he would much rather have a neglige for you to wear than a box of chocolates, so indulge him--buy a new one and put it in an empty chocolate box to fool him. If you are alert for lingerie sales, it doesn’t have to break the bank. And sometimes you can find a little mini skirt or sheer blouse on a sale rack for under $5. So keep your eyes open for sales, and your mind open for what might qualify as intimate apparel.

Make Up a Game

Use any game you already own, and make up your own question cards, situation cards, or penalty cards. Just remember to store these cards in a secure place, and not accidentally put the game away as is for the kids to find! If you have no idea where to begin, you can order games on line. In America around Valentine’s day, stores offer many options--Target has sold checkerboards with chocolate heart playing pieces, spin-the-bottle spinners, and body stencils with chocolate syrup and brush. Eckerds or CVS sold special dice sets, and most bookstores carry card sets, and belly dancing instruction sets. Each year is new merchandise, so keep a look out for this year’s offering. If money is tight, you can always window shop for inspiration and come home and make your own version with items you already have at home.

Sometimes we get the feeling that physical intimacy is dirty, but that is only true if it is done outside of the marriage relationship where real dangers abound. Inside the marriage relationship, however, it is a gift from God that is meant for delight. If you need help in this area, the book, “Intended for Pleasure” could be beneficial. It is written by a Christian medical physician, Dr. Wheat. It teaches you how to please each other--to figure out what each of you enjoys, rather than master some technique written in a book.

Buy a Game

Here is one example of games that you can purchase on line.

Seasons > Valentine’s Day > Ways to celebrate valentine’s day with the family> Ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your Spouse

Create a fantasy: 6 easy ideas

Aladdin’s lamp

Be his personal genie and grant him 3 wishes (or one if you are tired!) You don’t have to have a lamp, but if you want one and can’t find one, buy a gravy boat at a garage sale and spray paint it gold.

Bunny

Be his personal Bunny companion. Create the costume with a tea towel apron, black half slip rolled up to mini skirt length, and bunny ears from the dollar store, sold around Easter or Halloween

Nurse

Be his personal nurse and prescribe a healing treatment. White clothing or green scrubs and toy stethoscope complete the outfit.

Belly Dancer

I bought this tiny set of cymbals at a Books-a-Million.  You don’t have to know what you are doing to delight him!

Hide and seek

Put those airline blindfolds and ear plugs to good use.

Model and Photographer

Let him choose the outfits and poses for what ever “fashion house” you can impersonate...Victoria’s Secret, Calvin Klein, Sears!?